Being told that you or a loved one has cancer is always hard to hear, but I never thought it would ever be something that would happen to me.
It was cousin’s week. Every year my sister and I get together with our cousins for a week and we just hang out. Normally, it is at our grandparent’s house, but this year cousin’s week was a three-way split: my house, my grandparent’s house and my cousins’ house. We do crafts, take pictures, shop: we just do girly cousin stuff. At my house we were having a great time just being together. I didn’t think anything could ever ruin what fun I was having. Until it did.
We just got home from kayaking and my mom tells my sister and I that she needs to talk. I wasn’t sure what it could be. She normally doesn’t pull us aside, she just finds a time when we are alone. I follow her into my sister’s room wondering what it was. She proceeds to tell us that she got a call from the doctor while we were gone. The doctor diagnosed her with breast cancer. I was shocked.
“How could this happen to her? To my family?”
I ask myself, “Is this real? Or is this just a dream?”
This happens to other families, it can’t be happening to mine. I was just laughing in the kitchen with my cousins and now I am here in my sister’s room crying. I couldn’t a grasp this information. It was just too hard to believe. It was too hard to accept.
Now that my mom has lost her hair and has started chemo I am starting to accept it. There isn’t else to do but accept it and deal with it as best as you can and move forward.
While I have been denying reality, my mom has been very strong, she doesn’t let having cancer get to her. She isn’t complaining about being tired most of the time. She isn’t feeling sorry for herself. She is being as normal as she can be. To me, my mom is comfort. I go to her for anything and everything. I feel safe with her. Even though I don’t have to worry about it, I couldn’t imagine my life without her.
Throughout this journey, I have learned that you can get through anything with a smile on your face and she is going through chemo while being happy. The “problems” I have are nothing compared to my mom’s cancer. Life is short, live it to the fullest.